Meet Kristin Neff

Kristin Neff is a pioneer in self-compassion research. She’s been studying self-compassion for more than 15 years.  She’s the author of the bestselling book Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself and the co-creator of a training program called Mindful Self-Compassion. She’s also an Associate Professor of Educational Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. She’s written a new book called Fierce Self-Compassion, in which she describes how to know when to practice tender self-compassion and when to practice fierce self-compassion. 

Why Kristin Neff Is Mentally Strong

Kristin talks about her own experiences with self-compassion. She shares the steps she’s taken to develop self-compassion over the years. She makes it clear that she isn’t perfect. And she talks about the mistakes she has made and the lessons she has learned along the way.  In her books, she describes the strategies and techniques she applies to her own life. And invites others to experiment with the strategies that work well for her.

What You’ll Hear on the Show

The difference between tender self-compassion and fierce self-compassion Why women are socialized to practice tender self-compassion and men are taught to practice fierce self-compassion Why you shouldn’t shame your inner critic or beat yourself up for being too hard on yourself The emotional, social, and physical health benefits of self-compassion How to start cultivating self-compassion How to replace shame and blame with self-encouragement How to use physical touch to calm yourself down Why suppressing emotions doesn’t work How to balance self-acceptance with self-improvement

What You’ll Learn About Mental Health and Mental Strength

The conversations you have with yourself greatly affect your mental health. Being overly critical of yourself can lead to mental health problems. And the more mental health problems you have, the less likely you are to talk to yourself kindly.  It’s a cycle that can be tough to break. But as Kristin says, you shouldn’t set out to develop self-compassion for the sole purpose of alleviating suffering. Instead, practice being kind to yourself because you’re worthy of kindness.

Quotes From Kristin

I realized that many people had a misconception about self-compassion. They thought it was only the tender, gentle, accepting side. Too much tenderness without fierceness is like complacency. But too much fierceness without enough tenderness is hostility.We have to accept and change at the same time. We have to accept that this hurts right now and I’m going to do what I can to help myself in the future. What we know very clearly from the research is that if we deny negative emotions or we try to suppress them, it actually just makes them stronger.

More About the Podcast

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